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As a waiter, what is the cheapest thing a customer has done?

I’ve seen a bunch, so I’m sure I can pick the cheapest. DIY lemonade, trying to combine two “Buy 1 get 1 free” to get both free, all types of scams, etc.

But this was cheap and stands out:

At a pizza place I worked at, we had something similar to the “supreme” that a lot of chains have. A woman ordered this, but had me hold the ground beef, pepperoni, sausage and bacon. She added artichokes, pineapple, capers, black olives, peperocini, red peppers, almonds, chick peas, roasted garlic and extra cheese.

When the price came out to be $6.00 over the base price she flew at me! Screaming loud enough for the restaurant across the street to hear, she “explained” that since meat doesn’t cost as much as vegetables I shouldn’t charge her extra. Never mind that almonds cost more than sausage, that’s just not how things work.

I might have conceded and knocked a couple bucks off if she’d been reasonable, but after a few minutes of ranting she figured out that I wasn’t going to budge. So, she left.

And then she came back.

A couple of hours later, there she is again! This time she had a hand written list (this was pre-useful-internet) of all the ingredients. She’d gone to a grocery story and calculated the price per pound of each ingredient to prove her point. She was calm this time, but sat at the bar for at least 10 minutes trying to explain her logic.

I ended the conversation by saying, “We don’t put a pound of each thing on the pizza.”

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